The anatomy of a tipple
First drink
The first drink is polite. Maybe it’s pre-arranged, maybe we ended up in the same place at the same time. Rarely do we mean it when we say just the one but when it’s sincere, it lacks offence. It’s not you, it’s me. I have a drink to finish and a train to catch.
Second drink
The second drink is curious. At best, it’s a chance to dig into a story and return the initial question. At worst, it’s an opportunity to wrap up a tired conversation. Either way, it’s the perfect moment to repay a round and clear outstanding debts. Enough time to show face before checking your lockscreen and saying I really do have to get on my way.
Third drink
The third drink is amicable. It’s a signal of interest beyond anecdotes and small talk. There’s now room for questions and stories that are more personal. Maybe even an exchange of gossip, confessions and medium-term aspirations. There’s something in the air.
Fourth drink
The fourth drink is gracious. This is a friendlier version of the second drink. Much has been shared but there’s plenty left for another night. This is yet another chance to clear outstanding rounds or do something else with your evening. The exit is within the line of vision and up for the taking.
Fifth drink
The fifth drink is forward. The evening is growing longer, either because it won’t repeat itself or because it will. Round debts have lost meaning. I don’t smoke is up for debate in the presence of a cigarette and a bathroom queue.
Sixth drink
The sixth drink is lingering. There is no rush. Silence is a chance to mirror body language. A silent, unanimous decision has been to be each other’s evening plans. This is the last stop before the train home and the let me know you got home okay text
Seventh drink
Are we about to kiss?
Eighth drink
Hazy is the time for a nightcap. A text, safe and sound at home.